The Way of Love for the Lord
Chapter 14. Special talk by a nun (May 1, 1981)
Since I had no time to stand still there with my blank mind, I took another bus to the bus terminal. When the bus almost arrived at the destination, the clippie suddenly shoved another old man out of the bus, saying that he did not try to get off quickly. In fact he had difficulty in walking.
He fell off the bus flat on his face. Startled at this, I said to her, “How could you push the old man like that?” She retorted sharply, “It’s none of your business. You! Just respect the elderly well yourself.”
I got out of the bus, helped him get up, and accompanied him to his destination. Then, I went to the Bukdong parish church and saw a man coming out of the church. As I thought that he was a layman, I passed by him, entered the church, and asked if the pastor was available for confession. The reply was, “Dear me! He just went out. Didn’t you see him?”
‘Ah, the one who went out while I was coming in was a priest.’ I felt sorry for not meeting him but I believed that the Lord was preparing a plan unknown to me. So, I entrusted everything to the guidance of the Lord.
At the same time my heart ached so much over this thought. ‘I attended Mass but could not receive the Holy Eucharist for two days. What else could this be if not a lapsed Catholic?’
I had thought that there would be no darkness after getting to know God. Out of a desire to reclaim the light that I had lost, I got up early at dawn, took a bath, offered the preparatory prayers for confession, and left home but I wandered around until sunset.
I had to make haste because there would only be a little time left to go back to Naju after having confession and evening Mass. I was not familiar with Gwangju and the parish churches in it.
So I called Paul Lee, president of the charismatic renewal movement in Gwangju.
“Sir, do you happen to know the parish church where I can have confession and Mass?” He said, “Yes, go to the Honamdong parish church.” I asked him again, “Could I surely have confession and Mass in that church? Although I attended Mass, I could not receive Holy Communion for two days. So now I am dying of spiritual hunger.”
He said, “Sure! How good-hearted you are to think like that. I have never heard that from anyone. You will surely be able to receive the Lord. Do not worry, but go there in a hurry.”
Since I was pressed for time, I took a taxi, reached the Honamdong parish church and rushed in. Contrary to my expectation, a nun was giving a special talk titled ‘Moses and a staff’. I thought in disappointment. ‘I wandered around in vain all day long.
Needless to say, I won’t be able to have confession and let alone receive Holy Communion.’ It was because I had little time left to go to the other churches. Thinking that there could be a certain plan for me, I chose to listen to the talk attentively. I made up my mind to go back home after the talk ended since I was already in the church.
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